Sunday, July 02, 2006

Nothing missing

"Maybe someday u'll wake up...and barely conscious you'll say to no one...isn't something missing? You won't cry for my absence I know...you forgot me long ago! Am I that unimportant...am I so insignificant...?"
What kind of hell is that?
What kind of hell is that when you know you won't be missed...when you know that you are simply a face...a couple of weak eyes in the memory of a somebody...
How painful is it when you know that all of your suffering,all of your pain..all of your secret smiles amount to nothing but a faded memory..a disgraceful past...to someone..
and you spend your lonely nights thinking...knowing that you are nothing to someone.Yes.Wake up.Kill yourself.Kill yourself.You are a nothing to somebody.
"Isn't something missing...isn't someone missing me?"
In just one moment all of your life diminshes into a drop of rain falling to the ground....a dirt under people's feet.A drop inseparable from the soot and dirt and dust and disease of time.A nothing.
A nothing.
But you won't kill yourself yet.It will only make you a weaker memory.It will only reduce you to a couple of lines in someone's diary...a handful of dust in earth's hungry mouth.A handful of bones crushed by a mountain of grief.
"Am I so insignificant?"
And now you're left to gather what is left of you...turning and twisting among more and more people who only make you a less and less significant memory...
Am I so insignificant?

6 comments:

Wanderer said...

Hi Nono[if I'm allowed to give u a petname ;) ]
I absolutely love ur new post,and I thouroughly feel every word of it cus I always have the same feeling of"insignificance" and"meaningless."But that's the life we live in.It constantly makes us feel how"small"we are.However,I'd love to tell u something at the end,good people can never be forgotten.It's true that their goodness isn't always appreciated,and they don't get what they really deserve,but people won't forget them.They won't forget the moment in which u gave them a hand or made them a favor or were kind to them.They'll definitely remember this moment even if they remember it only within themselves.

Best Wishes

My Ideas_My personality said...

Know one fact, that if I wake up one day and I didn't find a post from you, then I will miss you and u will leave a great space in my heart and mind which you reserved, You are making a meaning by being significant, Even if what u write might be dust and dreams for you but its immortality for us if it touched the feeling, Go on Girl you are a star that won't be forgotten.

Wild at Heart said...

dear Wanderer,
your words just keep me going.I hope our feeling of insignificance would be simply a 'down' mood and not our entire vision of who we are,coz that's gonna be disastrous.Thank you!

my ideas_my personality,
ur words just left me speechless.So long as there is someone like you who can read between the lines and feel my little words,I will go on.
Thank you!

Art washes away the dust of everyday life said...

ur words echo my own feeling of insignificance .yet, never surrender 2 that feeling...u will never be a fading memory..when u help anybody, u leave a part of u inside that person's heart that will always be there....just be urself & u know u have the inner perseverance & strength ...Girl power :)

PinkBlume

Anonymous said...

some times you feel these feelings when you find that your friends donot care about you despite your continuous asking about them.yet life never stops to that extent especially when you find other loving people who care for you.
thx for expressing my feelings

Wild at Heart said...

And thanx, Anonymous, for making me feel I'm not alone.
And...I hope you're not someone I know. Coz if you are, I'll never forgive myself.